Friday, April 20, 2018

How to get motivated Every Single Day?

Image result for relax scenery night

It was 3:15 a.m, and I had woken up for the 3rd time last night because the sheer anxiety and fear that was pressing my head. I tried many times to sleep back but failed. I felt like I'm an unacceptably sensitive and I just hate being this way. I wanted to be like other people who are not emotionally attached to certain things.

I will cry just to make me feel exhausted and usually, it helped me to sleep. I realized I cannot be this way. I have to stand up and find my own source of happiness - less relying onto things I loved so much. I had to figure something out, because I wanted to get back, even in my fragile emotional state.

Here are a few things I have done to get started:-


  1. Meditate for 5 - 10 minutes. With relaxation music and morning view of the world from your house's window, especially when you're living in high-rise the feeling will be a lot better. I suggest you listen to Intouchables (Una Mattina) by Ludovico Einaudi.
  2. Workout. I found this really beneficial. Workout can push the toxic out from your body. It also helps you to sleep early to get your body enough energy for the next morning. 
  3. Be a happy pill to other's sorrow. I read Nick Vujicic's book called Live Without Limits. If you cannot get rid of your own sadness, at least you should be a happy pill to someone else's sorrow. Aren't you happy seeing someone else's happy smile because of you? 
  4. Be grateful. List down what you have in your life - family, friends, loved ones, achievement in life. Once you have the list, you will realize that you should be grateful of what God has given you! 

No matter who you are, no matter what you're going through, God knows it. He is with you. He is going to pull you through. Have faith. 

-msyns

Friday, December 01, 2017

Bersyukurlah Wahai Diri



Assalamnualaikum =)

Aku ada satu habit kat sosial media. Aku selalu meluahkan perasaan yang aku rasa melalui Islamic quotes yang terkena dengan jiwa dan perasaan aku pada waktu tu. Air mata aku pun akan berjujuran mengalir ke pipi sambil post. Kawan- kawan selalu merasakan yang kehidupan aku ni sentiasa dalam mood sedih hahaha.

Bukanlah nak kata kehiduan aku selalunya sedih dengan air mata. Aku ada juga masa-masa happy, tapi aku jarang sangat share kat sosial media. Dulu selalu jugak share, tapi sekarang dah kurang share, sebab aku tahu bagaimana perasaan melihat kebahagiaan orang lain yang kita tak boleh kecapi. Aku takut kalau orang lain tengok kebahagiaan aku tu, diorang akan lagi sedih. Sebab aku sendiri pernah menangis bila tengok post-post kawan semua best-best tetapi keadaan kehidupan aku yang menyedihkan. Sebab tu aku sekarang jarang kat sosial media sebab untuk elak overthinking yang kenapa Allah tak bagi pada aku apa yag orang lain dapat.

Pada usia yang menganjak ke-24 ni sangat mencabar. Alam pekerjaan, alam perkahwinan, alam persahabatan, alam kekeluargaan. Nak minta duit kat mak dah malu, dah tahu betapa susahnya cari duit. Dah mula fikir pasal tanggungjawab. Dah mula fikir pasal pasangan. Aku mengaku aku terkesan tengok kawan-kawan happy dengan pasangan masing-masing dan anak-anak yang comel. Umur pada waktu ini sudah pasti aku memerlukan tempat bergantung, tempat mengadu suka duka aku. Bukan aku nak mengatakan mak bukan sebaik tempat mengadu, tetapi atas naluri aku sebagai perempuan, sudah pasti kadang-kadang aku ingin dimanjakan seperti anak kecil. Tapi aku anggap semua ni sebagai satu peluang untuk aku berbakti pada mak dengan lebih lama lagi. Since ayah pun lama meninggal, apa salahnya aku hidup berdua lama sikit bersama mak kan..

Aku suka baca IIUM confession. Banyak cerita-cerita kehidupan yang aku boleh ambil iktibar dan sekali gus menjadikan aku lebih bersyukur sebab rupa-rupanya ramai lagi yang lebih tak bernasib baik dari aku. Salah satu cerita yang membuatkan aku menagis bila baca adalah kisah seorang anak bongsu perempuan yang sanggup kerja kampung supaya dia dapat tinggal dekat dengan mak dia yang sudah uzur. Walaupun kehidupan tak semewah kawan-kawan yang lain, tidak bercuti ke sana ke sini, tapi dia bersyukur dan happy sebab hari-hari boleh tengok mak, boleh jaga mak dia. Walaupun bukan 100% sama degan kes aku, tapi aku dapat rasa betapa kuatnya kasih sayang dia pada mak dia, sampai kan dia sanggup mengorbankan masa depan dia yg cerah demi mak di kampung.

Aku masih belum berkahwin, dan aku tidak terdesak untuk berkahwin. Bak kata kawan aku..

“Yunis, Allah itu Maha Adil. Dia bagi rezeki pada kitaorang rezeki kahwin awal. Dan Allah bagi rezeki pada kau kerja yang baik tetapi rezeki kahwin belum sampai sebab Allah nak kau jaga mak kau puas-puas dulu”

Aku terdiam sambal memandu...

Sesampai tempat kawan aku, usai ucap selamat tinggal, aku menangis meraung seorang diri dalam kereta


Subhan Allah, Allahu Akbar, Alhamdulillah ya Allah =) 

Monday, August 14, 2017

The First 2017 Blog Post



Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

Assalamualaikum :)

This is my first post on my blogger in 2017 after I haven't posted anything for almost a year. My last post was on 28 Sept 2016 titled "Cara Saya Turunkan Berat Badan". Actually, I did lost my weight last year but I gained it back! LOL :D

Even though I rarely visit/post something on this lovely blog (yeah because now we have instagram that comes with live update, instastory, etc), but I noticed somehow people still read my blog posts :p Thank you so much and I'm so sorry I couldn't have time to reply to all of your comments :(

I've moved to the new company since January this year. It has been 8 months working here and I love my workplace. Alhamdulillah. I've known new colleagues, learnt new knowledge and technical skills. Oh yaaa, currently I'm doing business development (specifically in retail) and also assisting my superior in supervising ferry terminal operations in Puteri Harbour, Johor.

Nampak macam hidup ni smooth je sentiasa, tapi sebenarnya tak jugak as I cried few times this year. Sometimes, life has been so hard for me but I must keep on living it to the fullest. I also experienced minor depression that caused all my muscles to be tensed up, lucky I was afraid I would be crazy and I seek myself to see doctor. Doctor advised that I should do regular exercise to produce more sweat and release tension. Masalahnya setelah berbulan-bulan, sampai sekarang belum start exercise lagi HAHAHA :D

What else to update eh?

I've moved to a new house
I've two bestfriends #SYZhotchicks who will end their status as single ladies this year
My "kereta selam" is currently fully functional. Alhamdulillah
I've photogenic skills that can make all my photos look pretty whilst actually they're not! hahaha
I've been friends back with Ain. So #Trio is back. Alhamdulillah
I'm now called Mak Lang to my 5-month nephew #AdelWafiq #MakLangLovesYou
I'm now reaching my mid-20s
I'm planning to go Umrah next year with my mother, please pray for me
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I think I've lost my writing skill! arghhhhhhhh

Okay lah. I think I should stop until here because tomorrow is the 2nd working day of the week (padahal dah takde idea nak cerita apa) hehehe

Goodnight earthlings! Assalamualaikum

xoxo


Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Cara Saya Turunkan Berat Badan

Sejujurnya sisthur bukanlah orang yang selayaknya untuk memberi nasihat tentang berat badan. Sebab sisthur pun sudah berkali-kali kecundang nak turun berat badan since daripada zaman sekolah lagi hahaha. By the way, this post is not meant to share how to kurus kan your badan sampai nampak skinny habis tau…this post is to share tips to girls yang teringin nak dapatkan berat badan ideal.

Reti kira tak berat badan ideal?

Ideal Body Weight = (Total Height (cm) - 100) – (15% x (Total Height -100 cm))

Let’s say tinggi awak 165 cm, so berat ideal awak adalah 56-59kg. Pergh nampak macam berat je kan untuk seorang perempuan.. But hello! Berat awak kena lah bersesuaian dengan tinggi awak. Jangan lah awak ikut berat 45kg, memang la awak rasa berat tu macam berat orang perempuan, but can you imagine tinggi you 165cm pastu berat you cuma 45kg. Boleh bayangkan tak kalau ada angin taufan melanda nanti?

Tapi kalau awak rasa 56-59kg macam berat, awak still boleh adjust sampai 51kg (tapi ni dah hampir masuk kategori underweight tau). Seelok-eloknya ikut lah Body Mass Index (BMI).

Sisthur punya tinggi 159.5cm. Berat paling tinggi yang pernah sisthur catat masa study dulu 70kg. Kauuuu hahahahaha. Tapi masa tu sisthur tak kesah sangat tapi kesah la jugak sikit-sikit hmm. Macam-macam sisthur buat tapi tak berjaya sebab tak konsisten. Sebab sisthur happy dengan kawan-kawan keluar makan sana sini. Pastu ada pulak kajian menunjukkan lelaki lebih suka perempuan chubby berbanding kurus sebab lagi comel, hmm lagilah semangat nak kurus faded hahahaha. Phuiii..
Tapi, sejak sisthur dah start kerja berat badan sisthur macam senang pulak nak turun. Sisthur takda buat pun Diet Atkins or Diet Kevin Zahri sebab sisthur tahu sisthur jenis orang yang susah nak konsisten. Sisthur pun nak turun kan berat badan slow-slow tapi asalkan konsisten. Ye laa kalau turun cepat-cepat bukannya nak kawen pun kan. So meh sini sisthur share apa yang sisthur buat sampai boleh turun -8kg dalam masa 4 bulan dan insyaaAllah nak turun lagi ihikss :p

1.       Minum sebanyak liter air (plain water)

Cliché sangat kan tips ni. But it works! Dulu sisthur masa study setiap bulan mesti demam 3 hari. Setiap bulan okay. Tapi since sisthur amalkan minum air selepas bangun tidur, sebelum makan, 30 minit selepas makan dan sebelum tidur, Alhamdulillah sisthur tak pernah demam teruk sangat selama beberapa bulan walaupun bermacam-macam ribut taufan melanda hidup sis Alhamdulillah body sis masih mampu bertahan. Bila rasa badan nak panas je, cepat-cepat minum air untuk control balik your body temperature. Tekak pun jarang-jarang sakit.

Berapa banyak air nak minum? 3 liter ke?
Tak.. lain berat badan lain liter air kena minum. Ingat ni!

Amount of water (liter) = Weight (kg) / 30

2.       Lauk & Sayur sahaja

Kalau rasa awak nak slow-slow turun berat badan, awak boleh ambil nasi sesenduk masa lunch. Kalau awak nak cepat turun berat badan, jangan ambil nasi langsung selama 2 minggu. Memang parah sikit weh hahahaha. Kadang-kadang rasa nak nangis sebab tengok nasi tu macam panggil-panggil nama kita! Seboleh-bolehnya cari geng “no rice” untuk 2 minggu ni. Insyaa-Allah selepas 2 minggu badan rasa ringan & korang pun takde lagi nak nangis cari nasi. Selalu lunch sisthur ambil ikan sekor & sayur / ayam seketul & sayur / nasi & sup sayur (kalau ngidam nasi). Jangan sentuh junk food, fast food, jajan2.. BIG NO. Banyakkan minum plain water.

3.       Zumba & Jogging

Dulu kat gym office sisthur ada buat Zumba Class masa Friday’s lunch break. Masa tu lelaki-lelaki semua pergi solat jumaat so perempuan-perempuan ni boleh la tertunggang terbalik melintang menegak meniarap sampai peluh keluar macam air hahaha. Tapi sekarang zumba kat office macam slow sikit dah. So sisthur zumba kat rumah kalau free. Sometimes sisthur jogging..Tapi sisthur tak konsisten sebab jogging ni kan bosan hehehe.

4.       Be a brokenhearted girl!

TIPS ni yang paling BERKESAN sekali! Kat atas tu sisthur ada cakap sisthur dah kurang buat zumba pastu sisthur beralih pada jogging tapi tak konsisten kan.. Apa yang sisthur perasan berat badan sisthur turun banyak gila bila sisthur sedih. Sejak sis masuk dunia kerja ni, ada 2 kejadian penting yang bagi impak tinggi kat sisthur. (1) Kereta kena banjir (2) Hati sisthur terluka wuuwuu.. Masa kereta banjir sebulan jugak la sisthur menangis, deal dengan service centre, perhabis duit, takde selera makan, pergi jugak kerja nak hilangkan kesedihan pastu balik rumah menangis balik, makan entah kemana, perut berbunyi nak makan tapi mata menangis lagi. Dalam sebulan lebih jugak macam tu. Berat sisthur hilang 5kg woo..
Lepas beberapa bulan, kejadian ke-2 pulak berlaku..pun lebih kurang sama. Hati sisthur dikecewakan. Bila teringat je sisthur menangis. Sisthur jadi takut nak balik rumah lepas kerja hahaha. Kalau dulu sisthur jogging sebab nak kurus. Kali ni NAK KURUS dah tak ambil peduli dah biar lantak! Sisthur jogging setiap kali balik kerja sebab nak buang segala kesedihan keluh-kesah dalam jiwa ni! Sambil jogging sambil dengar zikir “Ya Latif by Hafiz Hamidun” “Hasbi Rabbi by Khai Bahar” perghhh masa jogging tetibe mata macam rasa panas rupanya sisthur jogging sambil menangis. Masa berselisih dengan orang lain buat-buat macam tengah lap peluh hahaha! Terus terang cakap eh, bila kita tengah sedih gila cuba la jogging mesti kita akan rasa power badan kita bertambah macam kuasa kuda! Sisthur pusing tasik 10x sisthur buat sit up 100x. Kaki sisthur rasa sakit tapi hati sisthur lagi sakit! Semua ni sisthur buat sebab sisthur nak cepat penat..so that bila sisthur balik rumah lambat (sebab jogging), sisthur terus mandi solat pastu tertidur. Itupun sisthur sempat nangis lagi hahaha. Sisthur lapar jugak tapi sisthur takde selera makan sebab hati sisthur lagi sakit daripada perut yang tengah berkeroncong minta makan. Hmm. Sisthur aniaya  diri sendiri.

“Allah remukkan hati hamba-Nya berkali-kali sehingga hamba-Nya dah takde harapan selain hanya BERHARAP kepada ALLAH”. Ya Allah…

5.       Before 7

Sekarang sisthur dah okay sikit. Sisthur start makan malam, but make sure before 7pm ok! Menu selalu sisthur ambik Bihun Kungfu (sedapnya tapi kalau boleh elakkan makanan bertelur!), Bihun Tomyam Campur (sedapnya! Recommended!), Bihun Goreng Singapore (sedapnya!). Kadang-kadang terbabas jugak makan Roti Canai sekeping sebab kedai tu punya roti canai sedap sangat hahaha. As usual, air mesti plain water k! No sugar! No ice!

6.       Jangan fikir sangat nak kurus. Kurus tak semestinya sihat.

Dah ramai orang sekeliling tegur sisthur. Seluar makin longgar, badan makin kecik cuma tak pernah lagi kena tegur pipi sisthur makin kecut hmmm. Ada yang siap cakap buat apa nak kurus lagi awak tu memang dah kurus.. Ada jugak yang tegur eh Yusnidar awak sakit ke? Awak makin kurus sekarang.. So I can conclude here, yang sisthur sebenarnya dah kurus tapi orang nampak macam kurus sakit. Hmm.. Maybe sebab mata sisthur. Bulu mata sisthur sebenarnya agak panjang & curly (original without mascara ye..eh macam riak pulak sorry hahaha) tapi disebabkan bawah mata sisthur lebam so orang lain ingat sisthur tengah sakit.. Puas dah sisthur adjust mata ni bagi ada celak sikit bagi mata ni nampak besar sikit semata-mata untuk tutup kesan darkcicle tapi.. hmm.. Dem.. Dari sini sisthur realize tak guna pun kalau kita berusaha nak kurus tapi orang nampak macam kita ni sakit. Lebih baik jiwa raga happy perasaan gembira badan pun sihat.. Tapi sekarang Alhamdulillah my eyes are getting better. 

Monday, August 29, 2016

Part-Time Home Tutor

Hi and Assalamualaikum,

Untuk makluman pembaca-pembaca (eh ada lagi ke pembaca hehe), saya ada menyediakan perkhidmatan private home tutor untuk pelajar UPSR, PT3 dan SPM pada hujung minggu (Sabtu & Ahad) atau sebelah malam (selepas waktu bekerja).

Antara subjek-subjek yang boleh diajar:

  1. Matematik
  2. Matematik Tambahan
  3. Bahasa Melayu
  4. Bahasa Inggeris
  5. Akaun
  6. Sains
Antara kawasan yang diajar:
  1. Segambut
  2. Kepong
  3. Petaling Jaya
  4. Gombak
*other teaching areas will be considered, insya-Allah depending on the availability :')

If you're keen to know more about me, you can drop me an email at yusnidar.usman93@yahoo.com and I'll give you my resume for your perusal ^^

Thank you so much. 

Ni laa muka cikgunya... Comel tak? Haha!


Monday, February 01, 2016

CGPA Aku 3.93 Tapi Aku tak Bangga Dengan CGPA Aku


15 tahun aku duduk di bangku belajar berusaha untuk mencapai sesuatu yang terbaik untuk membanggakan ibu dan ayah. Ya dulu ibu dan ayah tetapi kini cuma ibu ku sahaja. Alhamdulillah walaupun aku bukan dilahirkn dalam keluarga yang kaya tetapi ibu dan ayah ku amat mementingkan pelajaran.
Tahun lepas, May 2015 adalah bulan terakhir aku menghabiskan sisa kehidupan ku sebagai pelajar Ijazah Sarjanamuda Jurusan Pentadbiran Perniagaan (Perniagaan Antarabangsa). Tahun lepas, Nov 2015 aku menyarungkan jubah keramat yang diidamkan oleh setiap pelajar yang bakal menghabiskan zaman pembelajaran meraka. Tahun lepas juga, Sep 2015 aku sudah mulai bekerja di salah sebuah anak syarikat GLC. Iya aku mulai bekerja sebelum hari konvokesyen ku.
Saat ini, Feb, 2016 aku merupakan salah seorang pekerja di syarikat terbabit. Di jabatan Pengurusan Risiko (ia bukan Jabatan pilihan ku tetapi aku bersyukur dikurniakan environment kerja yang sangat seronok). Aku belajar terlalu banyak perkara baru. Terlalu banyak yang dahulunya tidak sempat aku pelajari semasa di bangku sekolah. Mungkin lebih tepat, bukannya tidak sempat, tetapi tidak berpeluang untuk mempelajari kerana ilmu teori dan ilmu praktikal adalah berbeza.
Berbalik kepada tajuk ku di atas, aku tidak bangga dengan CGPA aku. Kerana apa? Hari pertama aku menjejakkan kaki di syarikat, rakan sekerja bertanyakan “kerja mana dahulu?” bukannya “belajar mana dahulu?”. Sesudah aku menjelaskan aku merupakan lepasan graduan segar bugar dari ladang, mereka bertanyakan pula “university mana dulu?” bukannya “CGPA berapa dulu?”

Nampak tak disini? CGPA bukanlah satu faktor terpenting anda untuk dipandang tinggi di alam pekerjaan. Mungkin beberapa bulan pertama orang akan bercerita anda merupakan peajar cemerlang (jika mereka tahu latar belakang pelajaran anda) tetapi sesudah itu, kualiti kerja anda yang akan diceritakan.

Sebab itu, bagi aku aku tidak bangga dengan CGPA aku. Ingin aku perjelaskan bukannya aku tidak bersyukur tetapi CGPA 3.93 itu tidak boleh dijadikan faktor untuk aku berbangga kepada diri sendiri. Siapa tak mahu berbngga dengan pencpaian diri sendiri kan? Tetapi jika anda mempunyai rekod pelajaran yang baik, itu merupakan bonus untuk anda. Tetapi jka sebaliknya, carilah peluang lain untuk memajukan diri supaya tidak terperangkap di kepompong merendahkan diri daripada orang lain.

Aku sudah penat orang asyik menyatakan kepada ku “untunglah orang pandai, dapat biasiswa, lepas belajar belum konvokesyen lagi dah kerja, sekarang ni baru pulak beli kereta baru, untung lah kauuu..”

Aku dah penat untuk menjawab soalan yang aku rasa tidak perlu aku jawab. Aku yakin setiap manusia perlu berusaha sehingga ke titisan peluh yang terakhir untuk mencapai segala yang mereka idamkan. Sama seperti aku dahulu.


Tak ada rezeki yang datang bergolek. Sebab itu kena usaha. Bukan asyik merungut sana sini salahkan orang lain padahal diri sendiri malas nak berusaha. Sekian.

Saturday, June 13, 2015

Thank you for my loving life

Assalamualaikum and Hi peopleeeeee J


Lamanya tak singgah blog ni. O.M G I miss writing so much. Writing is one of my ways to express my feeling, I meant not to show off to you guys it is just writing makes me feel alright. 5 bulan kot since I left this blog. Yeah since Instagram has become a phenomenon we can just uploading photos on Instagram it is the easiest way to communicate with friends and familes rather than spend quite some time to write and post on blog.


Of course banyak benda nak ceritaaa. Since now is midnight with such a calm weather and nice environment I think I will write better hihi.


So here I am at my rumah sewa in Segambut. I have been living here with the owner (single mother) for 4 months since I started my internship. Ohh my internship went great and I love it so much. I met a lot of people and gained lot of experience. Time flies so fast. Yeah it really flies so fast!


Alhamdulillah I will be starting my career in the month Sept 2015. As what UEM Yayasan’s manager told me, I will be placed in one of UEM Group’s subsidiaries. They are UEM Edgenta (located in Bangsar), UEM Sunrise (located in Solaris Dutamas), Plus (located in Subang) and UEM Group (in KL Sentral). I hope I will get the best workplace that has best bosses and colleagues! Normally for fresh graduate like me they will put me around KL. For 3 years I will be undergoing job rotation which are related to my area of studies (Finance, Business Development, Marketing, etc). After 3 years of job rotation, I will choose the department that I fit best. Or if I find no interest in UEM anymore, I can leave and find another company (perhaps government sector) since my contract/bond with UEM has finished. Hihi. Okay okay let’s not think about leaving.. What I need to do now is to equip myself with basic professional skills as I am going to enter corporate world soon! Yeah!! J


Since I have finished my internship, now I am enjoying my 3 months of holiday. Being at home, makan, tidur, movies, okay okay I called them as enjoyment???!! I need to get my ass out of my bed and start to think about backpacking! Yeahh I should be on backpacking right now! But my other friends are still haven’t finished their internship yet. So I have to wait for them. Hmm please dear self you have to make this dream to happen! You have been planning it for such a looongg time..


And I have to spend my time with mum as well. Like a lot of my leisure time because I will not get this chance anymore when I am working soon. I need to utilize my holiday well.


To let you guys know, this upcoming 20th Nov 2015 I will turn 23. O.M.G tuanyaaaaaaaaa >,< yess yess patut laa mum selalu sangat tanya dah ada boyfriend ke belom? Hmm sorry mum your daughter is still single after break up 5 years ago. To let this story be more interesting and shiny, actually I do have a crush :P My heart says “hey go ask his phone number! His age suits yours well and let’s try if that kind of relationship (love) can happen” But as usual my brain is stronger than my heart and says “hey man should take the first step! You just have to be beautiful and kind and the best man will come” My bff also keep saying “kau ni jangan la memilih sangat.” Hmm okay girls I am not choosy okay I just still haven’t found yet a man that I can believe can sayang my mum like his own mother. I still haven’t… L  But yeahh looking at my high school’s friends that were married with caring husband and now having cute babies sometimes make me feel like I want to have that kind of life too.


I really hope every step that I am gonna take in my life will lead me to a better life. Ya Allah please guide me in every way. I need the strength, patience and easiness in every way so that mum and I can live happily with my future husband. Hehe J



#SYZhotchicks at College Annual Dinner, ABADI'15
Revolution of me in three years time
ABADI 13. ABADI 14. ABADI 15.

Kakaks of UEM Sunrise who have been loving and teaching me throughout my internship period

In front of the office. Awesome bare-hand sketching as background

So here is my story.. till we meet again. Holla! J

Saturday, January 10, 2015

Just My Thought

Assalamualaikum

It has been awhile I did not post anything on this obsolete blog. I was kinda busy (hmm I was not busy actually I was just feeling lazy to write my life stories as I assumed I should keep it into my own secret)

But today, my mood is kinda different.

What to story eh? hmm

Currently I am in my second last semester before I will be graduating. Next week I have two final exams to be attended as they are my last two paper exams. Then I will proceed to the last semester (internship) of Bachelor in Business Administration majoring in International Business.

I am totally happy with my campus life. I appreciate it most. I think that this campus life has changed me a lot internally and externally. I learnt about friendship. How to give and take in this so called friendship. How to describe or study about other people behaviors and how to react to theirs so that I can tolerate with different kind of behaviors.

Of course, I also have fallen in love. I do not know whether to call it "Cinta Kampus" or whatsoever. Since my last serious relationship with a guy was about 3 1/2 years ago. Since then, I was kinda hard to express my feelings and I prefer to keep it as secret till I forgot about my feelings towards my crushes! Hahaa. Their names should be kept as secret as well (yes I have many crushes, unfortunately all of them did not know that I have had feelings for them in the past). This does not mean that I liked all of them at the same time. NO. The feelings always changed from time to time. That is why I call it "Cinta Kampus" because I am not sure this is a real love or cinta suka-suka.

The true here is, I am still waiting for him. For him who will be willing to be a part of my life in future. Who is gonna take care of my mum and me. Who is willing to guide me to my Creator. HIM. That I do not know yet who is he. But hey! Watch out cos I am waiting for you (my jodoh) every single time. lol.

This is another part of story. I always hope that some day I will achieve what I have been working for all this time. I hope that I have that strength to begin my new chapter of life. To be as a real worker in a real working world. That would be totally different. No playing around, I have to build a new relationship with new people. Somehow I think that is gonna be awesome! but somehow I think it would be scary. But I believe in mum's doa. As long as she is still alive and keep doa-ing for my best, I believe everything is gonna be alright. Justtt alllll right......

Every soul will face hardship. So do I. Therefore, I have no right to complaint to Allah. Thank you Ya Allah for everything You have given to me. Happiness, sadness, hardship, victory, everythingggg. I appreciate it a lot. I promise that I will keep fighting for my best and be a good human on earth that can facilitate other living things as well. Promise.


Side Note: Sometimes, we are confused about our own feelings. Are we sad? happy? angry? The best thing that we could do is stay calm, make some time for ourselves to think, appreciate what we have right now, do not envy to other people, and believe the right event will come to us when the time is right.